Monday, October 10, 2005

Two Shots of Happy... One Shot of Sad

Ok... this is just an attempt to see if I can actually write a blog after 1 bottle of wine (white zinfidel) and a vodka tonic (and as to see I don't drink more than I can handle, I poured the rest of the half a bottle of vodka I had left).

After all that's said and done, you can obviously tell that I have been having a crappy time with my life lately. Why else would I be drinking so much?

First off, I truly do hate anatomy. I barely passed. Please pray for me that I'll do better. I worked my ass off for that stupid test... only slept 3 hours and Red Bull/Monster/energy drink of the week didn't help much. The whole thing drove me into insanity Friday.

Second, well... how do I explain this? I might as well tell you...

Yes, I am in a relationship (at least I still think I am), but so far, it's not going very well.

For one thing, he's always out of town which worries the heck out of me. So... I don't ask about anything.

Second, I've been burned a million times; so the words "I really need to talk to you" aren't what I need to hear when you just need to tell me you wanted to know what I wanted to do this weekend.

So... he said those words (err... IMed) and I'm all... WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON??

Freaked me out. I messaged back "How did I know this was coming?"

He said "I see how confident in our love you are" and "I need to cool down before I saw something I regret".

Confidence has nothing to do with me being in love with him (don't ask) because I do love him, but I'm just scared of losing him.

Needless to say, due to my insecure jump to conclusions, he's mad at me and I haven't talked to him since.

I tried apologizing... but not to the point of begging (please... do I look like a beggar?). I tried talking to him. Heck... I even tried texting him to no avail.

All the people I have talked to said he'll come around and that it's not my fault that my mind is programmed in such a way to think bad out of "I really need to talk to you".


You know that means:

Bragging rights and JDC getting his P.A. pierced. I'm assuming he's gonna be in a lot of pain.

If you don't know what a PA is, you are really that sheltered.

I seriously hope he sends a pic. I've never seen one. LOL.

And that's it for my drunken post. Please give me your opinions so I don't think I'm crazy.



At 9:52 AM, October 11, 2005, Anonymous udontwannaknow said...

hmmm....I agree with what everyone else has said...he'll come around. I don't think you really did anything wrong at all! It's not your fault that phrase triggered something bad...I've been there too many times! He'll come around!!


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